The Help

If you have not read/watched the help please do so.  It is a fabulous and accurate accounting. Somehow the other night I turned into the help. Perhaps it was the scholar or sociologist in me that chose to stay in the flow for that is what I did.  A friend needed help getting ready for his dinner party so being who I am that is what I did. At first when people came in I was introduced but perhaps the act of slicing potatoes and being new put me in another category? I do not know.  All the people were gathered in the courtyard socializing. A few times I tried to join in and perhaps it was that I was new or they were just confused about my position – help or guest that I only got very brief polite responses.  At first there were a number of people I wanted to connect with, one claimed to be a screen writer another have internet tv station and one very nice man.  He it turned out was the only one who saw me as a human not the help.  One woman who did nothing but talk down to me and yell at me in bitter tones was estatic when I left but chased after us just to be sure “nothing was going on.”

The point is when people see you as “the help” their attitude changes.  They treat you as if you don’t really exist and are definitely on a one down or with some just above the curb down from them. I was actually feeling like two people for awhile.  The one who was being negated and minimized and the one who was hurt by being an ignored guest. By the end of the evening from my outsider view point I saw what it was like if only for 3 hours to be the help.  A fascinating and life changing point of view.  I did not attend expecting to be the help but a guest who kindly helped out while all the others waited to be serviced.  Yes, serviced is the word I intended to use.  Not one picked up a finger to assist.  The mean woman did yell at me for cutting the lemons wrong.  I cut wedges and she wanted them cut in half.  No one told me so I did what I did.  She was also the one who only ate RAW food.  This has given me second thoughts about just eating raw.  I think she may go home and eat raw lion or raw alligator. As they say you are what you eat and she is pure meanness.

It was a very interesting experience and one I would never wish to repeat with those people.  It did give me a first hand perspective on being the help but I held my tongue and watched from a sociological viewpoint. She the movie or read the book, “The Help, and then please review how you treat others.  Even the help is an equal.

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